My blood pressure is up tonight. In just two posts on a Facebook forum we had these gems:
"Tooing and throwing"
"Etched its way into the lead"
"Just to tie me over"
WHY CAN'T YOU SPEAK?!! WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?!
Nobody, that's who! These are not actual phrases or expressions!! This isn't about being unable to spell, it's about not even knowing the words, even on a basic phonetic level. F*ck me. My f*cking cat has a better comprehension of English.
Thursday, 6 June 2019
Wednesday, 5 June 2019
If you've got nothing good to say.....
Ok, the irony isn't lost on me- calling a post "if you've got nothing good to say" on a blog dedicated to criticism. But let's get past that.
If you've ever shopped on Amazon you'll probably have noticed the Question & Answers section on products. If you've bought an item (and maybe you have to have also left a review) and someone asks a question about it, you get an email with that question asking if you can answer. You can also voluntarily answer a question without having bought the product, or having bought it through Amazon. There's no obligation to do so, and you get nothing in return. It's purely an invitation to try and help if you can.
The mind boggles then, at some of the responses (these are just a drop in the ocean):
Q: I'm thinking of buying a set of diamond drill bits alongside this drill. Are there any bits the drill won't accept?
A: Sorry but I've not tried it with diamond drill bits so cannot say.
Q: Hi how much does this drill weigh, including battery?
A: Hi there, the drill weighs about the same as any other drill, no difference really. Ask the manufacturer for weight in kilograms. Hope this helps you out!
Q: Is this television easy to wall mount?
A: Sorry I don't know because I have never wall mounted a television before
Q: Can the (TV) power cable be changed? I'm sending it to country with European plugs.
A: I really don't know. But just to warn you the sound isn't very loud.
**Disclaimer. All the above are based on genuine quotes from Amazon UK, however I have re-worded them slightly to avoid potential copyright issues.
If you've ever shopped on Amazon you'll probably have noticed the Question & Answers section on products. If you've bought an item (and maybe you have to have also left a review) and someone asks a question about it, you get an email with that question asking if you can answer. You can also voluntarily answer a question without having bought the product, or having bought it through Amazon. There's no obligation to do so, and you get nothing in return. It's purely an invitation to try and help if you can.
The mind boggles then, at some of the responses (these are just a drop in the ocean):
Q: I'm thinking of buying a set of diamond drill bits alongside this drill. Are there any bits the drill won't accept?
A: Sorry but I've not tried it with diamond drill bits so cannot say.
Q: Hi how much does this drill weigh, including battery?
A: Hi there, the drill weighs about the same as any other drill, no difference really. Ask the manufacturer for weight in kilograms. Hope this helps you out!
Q: Is this television easy to wall mount?
A: Sorry I don't know because I have never wall mounted a television before
Q: Can the (TV) power cable be changed? I'm sending it to country with European plugs.
A: I really don't know. But just to warn you the sound isn't very loud.
Q: Are the speaker cables hard wired?
A: This was a birthday gift for our Grandchild and I didn't look at it before wrapping.
What makes someone take time out of their day to reply to a question they don't have the answer to? Are people really that stuck for something to do, or it is it a symptom of the narcissistic Facebook-age in which we live where people will take any opportunity to be given a podium on which to offer their take on the issue, no matter how irrelevant?
What makes someone take time out of their day to reply to a question they don't have the answer to? Are people really that stuck for something to do, or it is it a symptom of the narcissistic Facebook-age in which we live where people will take any opportunity to be given a podium on which to offer their take on the issue, no matter how irrelevant?
Granted, the questions are often as stupid as the answers (no such thing as a stupid question? I think we've regressed as a race since that phrase was coined), but sometimes it's refreshing to see these met with the comical sarcasm they so often deserve:
(on a micro-system CD player)
Q: Would this be suitable for use in a caravan
Q: Would this be suitable for use in a caravan
A: Depends on the size of your caravan. My Barbie's caravan is smaller than the unit so in her case no.
**Disclaimer. All the above are based on genuine quotes from Amazon UK, however I have re-worded them slightly to avoid potential copyright issues.
Saturday, 27 April 2019
A bunch of things.....
It's been a while since I've been in a massive rage - maybe I've been bottling it up? So here's a real mixed bag;
Firstly, Social Media Influencer - what the f*ck is that?! This is tantamount to a job role these days, apparently. So I'll tell you what; if you're influenced by what you see or read on social media you're an absolute f*ckwit. You either need to sort yourself out or give up on life altogether. Grow a pair, stop being an absolute lemming moron and get out of the house - and leave your f*cking mobile phone inside.
"Acca's": I used to work in a bookies and there was never such a thing as an "acca". This is a completely made-up word for the idiot-generation we now live amongst who can't be arsed speaking properly. And playing straight into the hands of it's desired audience it isn't even a proper abbreviation - it's not an "accAmulator", it's an "accUmulator". Can't even get that right....
Chimps: The news was reporting yesterday that chimps had learned how to watch videos on mobile phones. This isn't news; everywhere I've been for the last decade I've seen chimps absolutely glued to them.
National Insurance & Pensions: Get your head around this one;
Man A earns £200 a month from the age of 20 and pays £11 NI a month - total paid up to retirement age = £12000, qualifies for full UK pension.
Man B earns £2000 a month from the age of 20 and pays £66 NI a month = total paid up to retirement age = £39,600, qualifies for exactly the same pension as Man A.
Man C earns £4168 a month from the age of 20 and pays £413.92 NI a month but retires at age 29; total paid = £44,703, doesn't qualify for any pension at all despite paying in nearly four times as much as Man A.
What was that ever-churned-out saying about the rich getting richer?
Firstly, Social Media Influencer - what the f*ck is that?! This is tantamount to a job role these days, apparently. So I'll tell you what; if you're influenced by what you see or read on social media you're an absolute f*ckwit. You either need to sort yourself out or give up on life altogether. Grow a pair, stop being an absolute lemming moron and get out of the house - and leave your f*cking mobile phone inside.
"Acca's": I used to work in a bookies and there was never such a thing as an "acca". This is a completely made-up word for the idiot-generation we now live amongst who can't be arsed speaking properly. And playing straight into the hands of it's desired audience it isn't even a proper abbreviation - it's not an "accAmulator", it's an "accUmulator". Can't even get that right....
Chimps: The news was reporting yesterday that chimps had learned how to watch videos on mobile phones. This isn't news; everywhere I've been for the last decade I've seen chimps absolutely glued to them.
National Insurance & Pensions: Get your head around this one;
Man A earns £200 a month from the age of 20 and pays £11 NI a month - total paid up to retirement age = £12000, qualifies for full UK pension.
Man B earns £2000 a month from the age of 20 and pays £66 NI a month = total paid up to retirement age = £39,600, qualifies for exactly the same pension as Man A.
Man C earns £4168 a month from the age of 20 and pays £413.92 NI a month but retires at age 29; total paid = £44,703, doesn't qualify for any pension at all despite paying in nearly four times as much as Man A.
What was that ever-churned-out saying about the rich getting richer?
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